Ramblings
by PurpleYin
Summary: McKayWeir poetry series.
1. Somewhere

A/N: These are my poems - written about SGa characters yes, but still mine, hence copyrighted and no archiving anywhere else without my permission.

Hope you enjoy and reviews are also nice, a courtesy to help improve.

Angsty Rodney PoV on Simon/Elizabeth

**Somewhere**

Tell me what to be  
Because there's no answer I can be sure of  
I want to be one thing  
One person  
Someone you can love  
Someone that you love

And what's that  
With my empty heart  
Waiting for your command  
Something missing  
Lacking in me  
That would be you

And  
When  
When you're a million miles away  
When you rest in his arms  
What can I do?  
Who will I be?

Simply me I realise  
Eyes to the sky  
Whatever you want  
There's one reason that can never change

Just me  
My love  
And what good does it do?  
The truth exposed but nothing better for it  
Just me and my unrequited  
A single star among billions  
A lone hope, a dream; lost to another man  
But  
Somewhere, still, out there


	2. Dancing

A/N: These are my poems - written about SGa characters yes, but still mine, hence copyrighted and no archiving anywhere else without my permission. 

Hope you enjoy and reviews are also nice, a courtesy to help improve.

Angsty Rodney PoV, about fear of changes.

* * *

**Dancing**

* * *

Heaven knows  
Why I do this  
Standing outside the door  
Rehearsing the words under my breath  
Counting down  
Wondering how long until she opens it  
Wanting her to catch me, force my hand  
Waiting nervously, neutrally, never knocking 

Lines I'll never say  
Though they sound silly  
Idiotic, moronic, even for me  
How could I anyway?  
She wouldn't want to hear those  
Not from me  
Who wants that?

So I turn away  
Wishing for once I'd do it I should be glad  
To save myself from hurt  
And us both from embarassment  
But I'm not  
How can I be glad  
Because she's in there  
And I'm here  
And nothing has changed at all


	3. The Price

A/N: These are my poems - written about SGa characters yes, but still mine, hence copyrighted and no archiving anywhere else without my permission.

Hope you enjoy and reviews are also nice, a courtesy to help improve.

Highly angsty Rodney PoV.

* * *

**The Price**

**

* * *

**

When did I stop feeling and start lying?  
When did denial become the truth and the lies the norm?  
When did I ignore the ache in my heart and say it will all go away if I just...

Did it work as well?  
Did ignorance do its job?  
Or did my conscience get in the way of that sweet bliss  
The hit and miss of my method  
Because I thought perhaps.  
Maybe.  
Someday I might believe

If only I could repeat it enough  
If only I said it every day to my face  
And I saw no doubt in the mirror;  
That it could well be reality

When did I begin to feel again and start dying?  
When did the tears begin to fall, despite my denying?  
Because I never noticed it at all  
Or so I say, so I say to everyone

And they don't know why it happens now  
Why I can't keep quiet, why I can't stand by and watch her fall  
Because I was always opinionated, couldn't stop myself from saying what was on my mind  
Except that one belief, hidden even from me

And now all they see is a man on his knees  
Begging to a god who he can't please  
Praying in his own arrogant way  
Forgetting convieninetly that he doesn't have faith in anyone  
Only her, her spirit as it fades  
Something that he wants to save  
He couldn't rescue himself from himself  
His torture his pain  
But she's the last hope of his  
The sanity in his craziness  
Holding onto to her incase.  
Incase...

They're on the floor  
They're on the stage  
An audience  
The act over  
But no applause  
Waiting for the hero  
Waiting for the miracle  
Waiting for something to bring them back to life  
Back to how things used to be, when nobody knew what was going on  
Need to know and no one used to  
Wasn't it better that way?  
Wouldn't it be good if nothing ever changed.


	4. Put in place

A/N: These are my poems - written about SGa characters yes, but still mine, hence copyrighted and no archiving anywhere else without my permission. 

Hope you enjoy and reviews are also nice, a courtesy to help improve.

Rodney PoV set at beginning of 'The Eye", spoilers for that episode only.

* * *

**Put in place  
**

* * *

You want control  
You want to have a little soul  
But life's always getting in the way  
The life; the one you try to push away

You want order  
You want facts and numbers  
A theory to explain it away  
Because everything should fit into something  
Everything in it's place, even when you have none

You want control today  
And, perhaps to stay sane  
But there it is  
The careful walls all falling down  
The man you are cut back at  
And the control is lost  
You're lost, and you're pleading  
Don't let this be what it comes down to

Finally found a place  
Somewhere, something, nearly magical  
Don't take it all away  
Don't take them away  
Because they make it real  
You can only fit in when there's a space to fill

Don't take them away  
Don't take her away  
Because she makes you,  
Shapes you into something more  
More than what you were once  
Its not what you want to be  
But your best is her perfect version of you

And this is what it leads to; surprising you both  
Because you don't do lost  
Because you don't beg  
You whine, you banter

Because you don't plead desperately  
Or stand in front of the gun  
Barrel placed right on target at your heart  
You don't do giving a damn, not usually  
But you do today  
You don't let him take it all away  
Because you love her


End file.
